Drug Testing soon

[Throbbinwood]

I am strating a new job in a week and was wondering if anyone knows of any medical websites that tell how long drugs stay in a persons system. Specifically, how long after smoking weed would an individual have to wait before his piss tested clean? How about Psylociban?

I plan on drinking a drink to clean out the system before the test, but I'm still curious as to how long they stay in the human syustem.

[Hippie3]

psilo tests are quite expensive,
highly doubtful any employer would
spend the $$.
but weed is detectable for ~a month in urine

[Bluejay]

Erowid.com

Hippie now you know that one time use is only 1-4 days. continued use builds up in the fat cells...

Casual use of MJ is fairly easy to hide,lots of water and high fat intake 24 hours prior..You do not want any fat being used for energy from your body and cleaning out that thc from those spent fat sacks..

1-2 joints a weekend and passed many randoms 2-3 days later back in the day. ALWAYS HAD WATER WITH ME AND DRANK TONS ALL THE TIME...

Granted it is still always on the back of your mind wondering if it will be clean...

[shimmy]

if there not gonna be watching you then you can buy synthetic urine or if you dont have any money just heat up a freinds dirty ass white chunky piss like i did

[Mikester1989]

i know a guy that used hand warmers like you can buy at most anywere that sells camping supplies and just some fake piss... but dont forget to use something to warm it up because the drug tests can tell if the piss isnt the right temp... but you can go to high times nad buy some fake piss

[Binzit]

...why dont they use peoples hairs for drug tests instead of piss???

[hogwild]

folicle tests are more costly and time consuming. Urinalysis is easier therefore chosen by more employers.
You can always pass a piss test. There are many methods, do not get caught up in the ones that dont work such as bleach in the sample.... its best to just get known clean piss and heat it or get a synthetic kit that comes w/ a heating pad.

[toasty]

I havent smoked lets say for 3 weeks. Should I piss clean?

[Hippie3]

might get by some company test
but don't try any of that shit at the parole office.
many people in prison now
who thought they could beat the tests.
don't join them.

[hogwild]

ive beat tests w/ probation, you have to buy expensive prosthetics and its not worth it. Just dont do the drugs if your in a situation like that.

[OmBudsMan]

it could take a regular smoker about 4-5 weeks before the thc becomes undetectable...ofcourse, this also depends on your water intake, body fat and level of activity/metabolism.

as far as those drinks to clean out your piss...they haven't worked in an overwhelming majority of casses(and i'm using myself and a few of my friends as an example). they'll usually make the test 'inconclusive' which is pretty much seen as failing by certain employmers. if they do decide to give you another go, you'll just end up getting the same result unless it's juuuuust enough days to make your piss clean.

no use drinking two gallons of water a day for the next week because it'll just cause you discomfot. I'd say drink about 8 cups the day before and another 4-5 the day of the test. don't give them the first piss of the day, and if they are not watching don't pee the beggining of the stream or the very end(if they are not watching that is....just pee the very beggining in the sink/toilet).

[anticheffy]

I smoked about 3 joints around newyears after being clean for 8 months and I was testing positive 2 months later by store bought test kits, and eventualy did the fake pp thing and got the job.

[elhongo]

Hello All:
I might be in the same boat with a urinalysis. It's been 1.5 weeks since smoking, and probably can stall another 1.5 weeks until the test. I was a regular toker up until about two months ago and hit it sporadically after that.
To Recap:
a. sweat a lot up to the test and don't smoke anymore
b. skip the nonsense drinks from what I hear
c. fat load a few days before
d. drink the 8 cups of water the night before and 4 cups before the test
e. try not to piss the first and last part of what I am carrying in my bladder
f. keep looking for another job.
Sound good?
Hongo

[mycodutty]

If you are pissing for a normal company (walmart, sears, not a parole test, not a casino) it is easy to pass. I passed two of them smoking a couple of days before each one. Here is the method. Drink entirely too much water before the test. Really like a gallon. Piss before you leave repeatedly, and if you have drank enough water you will have to stop to piss on the way. Piss right before you go in to take it. Once you are pissing pure water you need to start taking big ass vitamin b tablets. They are yellow, they will make your piss yellow. Also continually take creatine powder and mix it in you water. This is a weight lifting supplement get it at gnc or right aid. If available take one maxide pill (water pill that makes people that don't need it piss a lot, not necessary but helps). You need to piss right before you go to take the test (like just minutes before). Piss the beginning of your stream into the toilet/sink then fill the cup and piss last of stream into toilet/sink. This will work. I tried urine luck additive and failed, I passed two tests with this. The idea is inspired from a box of urine cleaning crap my brother purchased and passed with. It consisted of a chart telling you when to drink water and 12 pills which the ingrediants listed as vitamin b and creatine. The idea is that you piss all water, the vitamin b colors it yellow, and some places check for creatine which naturally is in urine. Have faith brother, it will work, but don't try it at a casino. They called me when I used urine luck (tommy chongs additive) and said I had weed, cocaine, and urine luck in my body. The dude then ridiculed me and asked if I had a persciption for those drugs. I said "no, how do I get one?" He didn't see the humor in it, I did

[elhongo]

Yeah, that helps a lot. I have vitamin B and some creatine too. This is a typical pee test, not for parole or casino. What I really need is a smoke right now. I never realized how much it chills me out. This is my first one. It would be much less stressful if I could just take this test high. Haha.

I think the whole urine testing business for the regular folks out there is not just about the cost of a hair test(I heard the cost has dropped dramatically), but some kind of compromise to appease certain idiots. Even the VPs and head dudes smoke where I work...even on the job. They just give tests on start up, so they can get certain contracts. I get popped for this and don't get the job, and I might just start talking cause they are all hypocrites... Probably not. F it.

[koreanindica]

this will work if you are skinny and/or have a fast metab. i am a heavy smoker (several times a day) and i passed all three random drug tests for my prob while i was high. i just get a jar of pickles (the kind that are in the cooler and have garlic and other shit at the bottom. the morning before you go to ur test drink some water and eat all the pickles and drink the juice. now when u take ur test piss some out first to clean the pipes. i and some of my friends have tried this and htey all passed but one because he didnt drink any water or piss before test.

[Hippie3]

that's utter bullshit.
i personally know a guy who's sitting in
a prison cell right now
after trying that 'pickle juice' nonsense.

They just give tests on start up,

consider a pre-employment urine test
to be an IQ test-
they want to know if you're smart enough
to put down the pipe long enough
to pass an easy test.

[mindovermycelia]

I think synthetic urine is the way to go. You don't even have to quit. Just fork out a little $ and practice once or twice to make sure you have the technique down pat. That's what I would do. No stress at all, and you can be stoned when you go - just make sure you use visine.
I've never had a piss test for a civilian company where I was watched - only timed. In the navy they watch you. I passed lots of tests just taking niacin, drinking and pissing but that was 12 years ago and now they probably test for creatinine as well. The Navy is likely cheap though when it comes to urinalysis and it is possible they never even tested those samples. I did eventually pop after 3.5 years of service on a day when I wasn't supposed to be there and didn't take the usual precautions. Divine intervention is what I call it. I was going to reenlist.

[elhongo]

"consider a pre-employment urine test
to be an IQ test-"
I agree here, Hip.

They, however, also slapped me with a severe non-disclosure and non-solicitation contract that would put me in a bad position with some of the work I do on the side. I re-wrote theirs and they said they could not sign it, and I said that I could not sign theirs. So, we have a deal breaker. Maybe, stay on as contractor? Gives me more freedom. All this for not, now.

Thanks

Hongo

[OmBudsMan]

best thing to do for those that smoke heavy is really just stop for 2-3 months. not only will it give you a window of opportunity for employment that gives drug tests, but it will also make you appreciate weed when you start smoking again. I use to do this before I was even looking for a job to get a bit of clarity. currently, I haven't smoked in 12 weeks even though I have a job(which I got tested for after 7 weeks of non smoking and passed)...that really is the only sure fire way(especially for someone like myself that use to smoke a handful of times a day for months and months). then you don't have to worry about any of the nonsense and you can pee in the cup from your first piss in the morning until you overflow the bastard!

[Throbbinwood]

I decided to go the "fake urine" route out of sheer laziness. Was a piece of cake and I got the job. I'm now making the most money I ever have.

Thanks for the advice.

[shadyfigure]

i didnt know there was such a thing as synthetic urine

[anticheffy]

yup......it works

[fahtster]

you can also get things like the drinks.. ready clean, xtra clean, pure gold,
strip, omni.. the manufact. are detoxify, clear choice, covert labs.
these drinks contain certain herbs that stop your body from burning fat,
thats where the toxins are stored and slowly released through you urine.
thats why a heavier set person takes longer to get the toxins out.
the
directions are goin to say that you need to have not injested said toxins at
least 48 hours before your test. i'd even go three days to be sure. that
means staying out of rooms, cars, etc. where shit is going on. you need to
make sure you get the right one for your body mass. the reg. 'ready clean' is
for peeps up to 200 lbs. 'XXXtra clean' is for cats that are 200 -250 lbs.
and
the 'mega clean' is for peeps above 250 lbs. it's just basically more of the
same drink. the prices at local headshops is going to be $29.95-$49.95.
thats the detoxify brand. 'pure gold' is for 200lbs. 'XXXra gold' is for 250lbs.
and thats the purity brand. 'strip' is strictly for heavier set people. strip is
the covert labs brand.
if you don't have exactly 48 hours of cleanliness,
(they are VERY strict about the two days before hand or they won't work)
like maybe 36 hours. then you are going to want to do something like the
strip no matter what size you are. it's a big ass bottle, so be ready to drink
lots of nasty ass drink.
some basic instructions for the drinks are: two hours
before your test, drink entire contents of bottle.. you don't have to chug it
but drink it rather quick... wait about 15 mins... refill bottle with water and
drink that... allow for at least one hour for the drink to start working.. then
piss at least twice before your test to get anything dirty in your kidneys out.
then you have about 6 hours after the initial first hour that you are going to
piss clean. this is the time that your body stops burning fat. after that you
are dirty again. there isn't anything out there that is going to completely
clean you out as the toxins are stored throughout your body in your fat.
BUT it is a good idea to drink lots of cranberry juice and water a couple days
before your test to help hurry along the process. on the day of your test,
stay normally hydrated.. you don't want to just piss water, the test will come
back inconclusive, which isn't as bad as a positive but they will make you
take the test again and you just blew whatever money on your cleaning
product.
Clear choice makes an 'add-itive' (spelled just like that) that you
put into the cup before you piss, then piss on that. you also need to get it
up to body temp first but thats not very hard cuz it's just a small vial. but it
only works for THC and has very specific instructions.
it should come with
them but if not, you can look em up on the net. just look up Clear choice
"Add-itive". Dr. Greens makes a synthetic urine called 'agent X' it's unisex
and works great except that it needs to be heated up to body temp.. it
comes with a heat pad and rubber band to hold it on.
there is also a temp
reading strip on the front of the bottle so be sure to put the heating pad on
the back as not to screw up your reading... get it between 98 and 100
degrees F and you're all set.
there is also a saliva, blood, or urine product called 'labrion' and also one
called 'purified body cleanser' they only work for one of those tho.. you
can't use one for both blood and urine as they have different instructions for
each. clear choice also makes a shampoo. I'm in the headshop bizz so thats why i know what i know.
fahtster

[mindovermycelia]

Originally Posted by Throbbinwood

I decided to go the "fake urine" route out of sheer laziness. Was a piece of cake and I got the job. I'm now making the most money I ever have.

Thanks for the advice.

never had to do it myself, but I am grinning from ear to ear to know my advice has helped you

correction: our advice, I don't mean to take away from other's responses here!

[cheddar_bob]

to beat a test, get some glycerol, potassium, creatine, b Vits, and 2.5 gallons of water. start the "beat the piss test" protocol 3 hours before the test.

the water will dilute the sample. the glycerol will cause your body to filter out any "impurities" in the water. the potassium will add some electrolites to the diluted urine and the creatine and vit B will ensure that your sample is of the correct color and creatinine level to defeat the checks for a diluted sample.

[BIGBOOMER]

never one dirty piss from me and i smoke EVERY day water is all i ever use 1gal room temp start drinking glasses about three -four hours b4 you go and keep drinking until you go test you will piss every 15 min and BOOM you are clean of thc

[cheddar_bob]

Originally Posted by BIGBOOMER

never one dirty piss from me and i smoke EVERY day water is all i ever use 1gal room temp start drinking glasses about three -four hours b4 you go and keep drinking until you go test you will piss every 15 min and BOOM you are clean of thc

and your sample may be deemed "questionable" due to the dilution

[oibchip]

Sure fire method is to fill a condom 1/3-1/2 way and tie in knot...safety pin it to you boxers/panties so that it can get the warmth from your body as well as if the sample is being viewed by the tester it is easier to conceal. This costs only one condom and a safety pin and a good friend to loan ya some clean pee. Make sure that the sample person is the same sex as you and if you a girl make sure that the friend isn't pregnant either. It's a surefire bust if u use wrong sex pee. Unless u can afford to pay for fake urine.

[Lefty]

For the risk, cough up the loot for fake piss. Sure shot right there.

[bub]

Drug Testing - Cannabis.com Forums Message Boards...

... I suggest everyone to read ALL of the "stickies" especially the "Sticky: The TRUTH behind drug testing".

"ALL lab samples are "screened". They know that 99% of all of the tests are going to come up negative, so they hit them with the same $1.10 test that an onsite kit uses. If it comes out negative, it's reported negative and never sent to GC/MS. If it's positive, it heads over to GC/MS for quantitive verification."

You can buy these test strips in stores like CVS but they will rip you off.

Home drug test, kit for test marijuana, cocaine, meth
... "The Home Drug Test kits are 98% accurate for testing your system for toxins"

Most people do not know or are consciously aware of how twisted the US probation drug testing system is. You can do lines, get drunk, and/or do almost any other drug BESIDES weed and still easily pass your once a month probation drug test. Fucking retarded.

[mirrorsonthewall]

hey all
maybe a dumb question,
but if the urine isnt going to the lab and
the test doesnt test temperature,
why wouldn't you be able to just use pure water with a little yellow dye
instead?

i would just love to begin blazing again

[BillyJack]

I used the fake piss from a head shop a couple times and have several friends that have used it. No need to bother with anything else